I had the shits yesterday, and told my mate that I hoped there would be only one toilet per train that I had to get today (yes it's very nice to be home, thank-you. I'm having my own private welcome home party as we speak. Well, I'm having a cheeky vodka) and that I hoped it would be broken. I can't help but think some god or other heard that and took me a little too literally, like that joke where- pah, I can't be arsed finishing that sentence. You know a joke about shit being taken literally, fill your own blank. ANYWAY my train between Peterborough and Doncaster featured some severe over-crowding, several broken toilets and a broken heating system. Result? Poo sauna.