Friday, 24 October 2014

Frustration.

I'm starting to get really, really frustrated You know how when you've been seriously ill and you're in hospital or whatever, as you start to get better you just get to a point where you might not be totally well, but you're bored as hell, because it doesn't feel like you need to be there? I reckon that boredom is a pretty good sign of recovery, both in the analogy I just gave, and as where I am now. I'm at that level where I'm so bored of being bored that I can't really be arsed doing anything to combat it. Saying that, there's not much I could do about it even if I wanted to. Just keep on keepin' on, Condron.

I told my psychiatrist et al that I'm being neglected in here and that I'd be better at home. Granted, I was in an awful mood and so I was a bit dramatic, but I stand by what I said. And my anger and progress persuaded them to let me go home later today, until Sunday; home for more than a night, for the first time this year. GET. IN. But back to my neglect- they won't take me off my meal plan and let me sort out my own diet, but instead they're actually going full days without giving me food so I am sorting myself. If I wasn't feeling as strong as I am, I'd be en route to another NG tube, if left to them.

I'm ok, I'm fine, I'm just frustrated that things aren't going quick enough. I'm ready to do this, to kick arse, to get the life I always wanted. I can do it. I will do it.

1 comment:

  1. Yes you will do it Rebecca... your are tenacious and you are a fighter who never gives up... I believe in you and yes sometimes that boredom is showing us we are ready for the next stage...

    By the way, I am so happy you are getting to go home for more than a night, have fun xox

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