Tuesday, 28 April 2015

PMS.

Periods are great. No, seriously, they are. I am probably the broodiest person who has ever lived. If I was straight, chances are I'd be pregnant by now. I know it would be a terrible idea- I'm on some pretty strong meds that would have to be changed, and chances are I'd have to go onto some kind of  mother and child mental health unit because psycho-tropic med changes tend to make me really poorly. Like, not sleeping for days, and getting delusional and manic until I'm injected with a sedative like a bloody elephant at the vet. Do elephants go to the vets? I digress.

Periods mean that I'm a woman. They also indicate- loosely, but still- that I might still stand a chance of getting pregnant at some point. It'd be a bit more complicated too, given that I'm gay, but there are ways, mate, there are ways. I need to get my head in order, have a stable job and everything, but I want children so damn much. I know it's not sunshine and rainbows and days out and selfies, but I want to give a child a better start than I had. I don't mean that as a slight on my mum, 'cause she did well. I'm fabulous and my brother is, yanno, alright. But I learnt from her, I learnt from the situations I was forced into and I learnt from the ways I reacted to survive. And I know I can do it.

As most women know, periods are also terrible. I have pretty bad PMS and obviously it makes a bit difference to my mental health. I don't know how much has been done research-wise on MH+PMS but I can tell you now- it's bloody messy (pun not intended, but nonetheless, hilar). And, hey, maybe when I'm cured for the month, I'll do my own research. Anyway. Periods. They're expensive in terms of chocolate and tampons and wine and that, but they're also a sign that my body is finally entering the recovery that my head has started. I'm well and I'm a woman again. I'm bloated as hell and highly emotional and it's making me feel fat as owt, but I'm a woman. And, despite everything, that's not a bad thing to be.

(Going to finish now, before I cry on my laptop and get electrocuted. I really am PMS-ing).

1 comment:

  1. That time of the month with all the PMS'ing is difficult... but it is great being a woman... I love it. ♡

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