Saturday, 19 September 2015

For my best friend.

Al,

Your haunting is spelt out 
in the Braille of your visible bones. 
Sometimes, 
I'm scared to look at you.
On those pure occasions 
I see you.
In reality.
In photos.
In my head.

I'm scared that if I look too hard,
You'll break.
Your delicate bones
Without protection,
Without barrier,
Without knowledge of their own strength
Will plummet.

And once again,
I will not be able to save you.

Sometimes,
I cannot save you.
And your eternal sweetness
Would never ask 
Or expect.

But I want you to scream at me,
Like you scream at yourself.
Claw at me,
Like you claw at yourself.
Tear up words
Like you tear up your skin,
Your organs,
Your beautiful soul,
Fragmented.
All that you hate,
All that you direct to yourself,
Scream it.

To me, 
You are all that is good.
To you,
You should be all that you are;
More than you know.
Infinitely strong,
Impossibly gentle.
More than the back breaking demons.
More than what holds you below water.
Captive.
Seemingly alone.

But you forget;
you are never alone.

It hurts.
But oh,
It hurts.

And the death that chases you
That sometimes has you
Crying,
Begging,
Gasping,
Praying,
For the end to be soon.
Will not take you
On my watch.

I will cut off the food of 
Your enemies,
Of the ghosts and monsters
And re-direct it to your sinking bones,
Risen again.

2 comments:

  1. This is sad, I hope someone reads this and totally realizes how importan they are and how much they are loved ♡♡♡

    ReplyDelete
  2. Life is fragile, always will be. I often find that thinking about it makes me see things a little more clearly. There isn't enough time to be sad over things that really don't matter.

    / Avy
    http://MyMotherFuckedMickJagger.blogspot.com




    ReplyDelete